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By: Dr. Raymond

How can I make real friends?

When I was in my first year in the university, my friend and I will defend ourselves when others say bitter words at us. We really stuck for each other. This never happened by chance but based on the foundation our friendship was built from.

False belief about making friends

Some people still believe that making friends is something that is inherited or an inherited gene from their forefathers. Contrary to common beliefs making friends is completely easy and free to anyone even those having self-image problem. It is nothing more than showing real concern for your targeted victims and taking an active step in their activities

How to make real friends

One of the strongest factors on how to make real friends is to know the person's name. This is easy because you can start just by using simple words like 'hi, good day, 'how are you doing today? and after some time, you can then ask his name. In most cases, the person will reply and a conversation will start resulting to friendship.

  • What do you think of your self? Based on psychology, one of the things that can hinder a friendship is when we think negatively about ourselves. This is so because when we do, we often tend to project that same feelings on to others in the form of gossip or insults. To put an end to this, you need to make an effort to compliment and give priority to yourself including those around you. By viewing the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in you.

  • Friendship and interest. Research shows that when someone develops genuine interest in others, they will be drawn to him and this is how friendship develops. So if you can manage to show this interest they will perceive you as a friend.

  • Friendship target Some people choose to make friends only with those whom they think is popular. In this case smiling and talking in a confident manner around such people will make them believe you are a popular person. Others are impress that you care enough to remember their names and because of this, they may share common interest with you and friendship starts. Other factors that start friendship is the ability of sharing ideas with others or assisting someone with a task.

Making friends has never been a problem to some people but what matters to them is how to maintain it and when these frienships are not working out well it breaks. Usually these people never manage to build a lasting relationship not because they are failures but due to the fact that they depended on perfection.

Never expect perfection even when a friendship is up to a good start. We all make mistakes in all manners. Further more, friendship costs time and emotion. You have to be willing to give and share, You have your own feelings about things but you're willing to give in to make room for your friend's feelings and opinions.

Dr. Raymond is not just a psychologist but also a human behavioral expert. He is the author of the book 'How To Make Someone Fall In Love With You'. The book is based on relationship psychology, yet presented in a simple and understandable format. The book will dramatically increase your chance of making someone fall in love with you by ten fold.



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